History

Back in the days before DVD, VCD, MD, or CD players were born, i remember there was a night daddy stayed up watching tv all night long. By the time I woke up to go to school, he was still staring in front of the tv like a zombie. I assumed that that was his privilege, as an "adult" to do, and boy did i wish i could grow up faster and sooner...so i can stay up all night just to do "adult stuff".

When I came home after school that same day, he was cautiously playing with the VCR, rewinding the video tape inside, and replaying it over and over again. And all I saw on the TV was the news...repeating itself, over and over and over for hours. As i sat curiously (and impatiently waiting to watch my cartoons), he turned to me solemnly and said, "Nui nui, this VCR is saved for you. This VCR is made for you to watch when you grew up."...

I didn't understand a word of what he meant at all.

...20 years has passed, and I still have not touched or seen that video tape ever again.

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It wasn't until recently, that i started questioning...what DID happen in 1989, June 4th? Living in China, sometimes its like we're securely tucked underneath a bubble, and disconnected with everything and everyone else outside; until lately, this burning desire to know and understand history finally hit me.

I've always been a person who believes that everything happens for a reason;
I believe that everything that happens in life is a repetitive lesson to be learned until you FINALLY understand its essence;
and the purpose to understand history, is so we all can make better decisions for the future.

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2-3 years ago, when the Japanese denied the Nanjing Massacre in its educational textbooks, riots broke out within China. Japanese companies, stores, products and people became a target-point. Toyota cars were smashed on the streets. Japanese restaurants were vandalized. Yan An Highway was closed temporarily. Stories of Korean comfort women were finally publicized.The Chinese, young and old, all united through anger, towards the Japanese's act to unacknowledge the Chinese's sufferings caused by them.

And yet 20 years ago, as a group of Chinese students peacefully gathered to voice their opinions for liberation; it resulted in bloodshed and chaos with only "a few hundred deaths and thousands of injuries". Since that night, noone in China even dared to speak of it; nor acknowledge its happening.

Some say, the Chinese government back then, weren't physically and mentally ready to handle the group of younger and "opposing" generation. If even a quarter of the Chinese population opposed the government, the gong ans, the military, the local governments would lose control and be overthrown immediately. Serious measures were needed in order to maintain balance and control. And unfortunately, the Chinese government chose "fear".

In the West, people have the luxury and freedom of fighting for their rights. They do not need to threaten, abuse or harm anyone in any way, just to get their opinions across. Hence, fear and death is not necessary. And because in the West, people are granted with the rights of freedom of speech, of free will, or the freedom of religion...it also has resulted in idiotic-individuals (i.e. ex-US president) having unnecessary control and abusive power; of every other neighbor suing each other because "YOUR DOG SHIT IS IN MY PROPERTY", and causing a divided sense of belonging (a.k.a. Mormons vs. Scientologists vs. Catholics vs. Christians).

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For the WWII, the Germans apologized and claimed responsibility.

For 9/11, Osama bin Laden came forward and proudly took credit of their actions.

And consciously or subconsciously,
like everything and everyone else,
through time, people eventually move on.

In pain, in guilt, in anger...they move on.
Because they realize, they have to.
In order to survive and live,
people have to move on.

Less bitching, more living.
Less anger, more peace.
Less discontentment, more satisfaction.
Less grief, more happiness.

So, a really bothering question of mine lately...is admitting our faults, mistakes, and shortcomings a solution towards unification? For strength? For harmony? Does denial bring people further apart? Or does understanding bring people closer?

If the Chinese government acknowledges that certain historical incidents had occurred, that thousands (insert correct number here please) were affected, perhaps it will earn those people, who's judging from the outside, those of other nation, of other race, color or religion, some god damn respect? Perhaps it will bring closure to the victims and the angry? Perhaps, the older generation, or our current generation and the future generations can learn and move on too?

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I'm not saying history is right; but I am saying that history repeats itself until we have learned our lessons. History happens because humanity does not self reflect and evaluate enough; History repeats itself because we allow it to.